


The 'stache Stash

by Lamia of the Dark (VisceraNight)



Category: RWBY
Genre: Crack, Drabble Collection, Drama, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-28
Updated: 2017-10-09
Packaged: 2018-12-08 01:12:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11635854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VisceraNight/pseuds/Lamia%20of%20the%20Dark
Summary: A collection of drabbles about Watts, based on tumblr prompts. Some humor, some serious.





	1. Late Night Thoughts

~ The 'stache Stash ~

Watts was trying to go sleep... which happened to be a feat that was easier said than done here in the evil fortress, and the doctor feared he was fighting a losing battle.

It was so late, everyone should have settled down for the night, even the recently-spawned Creatures of Grimm. Just when he thought he might finally be starting to drift off, Watts heard the creaking of floorboards near his door.

 _That had better not be Tyrian trying to sneak in here and shave off my mustache while I'm asleep. AGAIN_.

Watts let out a heavy sigh and sat up, reaching out to turn on the lamp on his nightstand. There came a second telltale creak from just outside his door. His ears didn't pick up any sound of actual footsteps, from which he concluded that the sneak was exactly who he'd thought it was.

 _Damn it, Tyrian_.

Defending his glorious mustache was more important than sleep.

~oOo~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt: their thoughts late at night


	2. Emerald's Nightmare

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt: a terrifying scenario

~ The 'stache Stash ~

Watts was awakened by screaming, which wasn't an uncommon occurrence at Salem's fortress of evil. He recognized this particular scream as belonging to Emerald, though, which meant that it was his duty to deal with it.

Watts sighed and dragged himself out of bed. He swiftly made his way to the girl's room, but paused outside the doorway. Once inside, he would have to traverse the room blindly to get to her and wake her up. Not that there was anything wrong with the lighting in her room. No, the problem was that Emerald unconsciously lashed out with her semblance when in the grips of a nightmare, so anyone attempting to wake her had to mentally fight their way through her nightmare while blindly attempting to locate the tormented girl.

Tyrian had accidentally stung the girl during one of these episodes, Cinder had set her on fire twice, Mercury flatly refused to involve himself in the situation, and Hazel calmly offered earplugs as a solution for everyone else's sanity but refused to offer comfort to the distraught teenager.

Which left it up to Watts to take care of. He steeled his nerves and pushed open the door.

~oOo~


	3. Baby Nuck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The OC (Mikado Haruna) that appears in this chapter belongs to aut-bahn/cbhn-isms on tumblr and is being used here with permission. Baby Grimms and Salem being motherly toward the Grimm are headcanons/characterization borrowed from grimm-goddess-salem-isms on tumblr. (This chapter is pretty heavily based on tumblr shenanigans at the -isms fam Evil Fortress, although this exact scenario isn't something that came up in RPs.)

~ The 'stache Stash ~

Watts stepped out of his room to demand, "Can you stop that infernal racket?"

Mikado, the stray falcon faunus that Salem had picked up from hell knew where, was chanting "Baby Nuck, do doo do doo doo. Baby Nuck, do doo do doo doo" over and over again in a loud, childish sing-song.

"Trust me, you don't want him stop," Tyrian piped up.

"I do _not_ trust you, and yes I _do_ want him to stop."

Mikado shrugged and stopped singing.

The tiny Nuckelavee Grimm that had been hopping around his feet happily as he sang, now let out an ungodly shriek.

"I _tried_ to warn you," Tyrian said.

Watts' reply was drowned out by the next scream from the little monster. The Nuckelavee took a swipe at Mikado's leg with its claws.

"Hey!" the teenager snapped, as he dodged the blow. "It's not my fault! Blame Watts!" He gently nudged the creature in the doctor's direction.

"SKREEEEEEEEE!"

Even if it was barely a foot tall, having that monster rush at him screaming with murder in its eyes was rather unnerving.

Not wanting to be on the receiving end of an enraged Grimm's wrath, no matter how tiny it might be, Watts did the one thing that would surely stop the beast without harming it (because Lady Salem would be upset if one of her precious babies was harmed without permission.)

"Ba... baby Nuck, do doo do doo do."

His rhythm with the song was off, but the baby Nuckelavee stopped its angry charge and started to dance again.

~oOo~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt: a frustrating moment


	4. The Godstache

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The OC (Void) that appears in this chapter belongs to thelastvoidwalker on tumblr and is being used here with permission. Port's mustache being better than Watts' mustache is kind of a running joke in the -isms fam.
> 
> prompt: favorite memory involving another person's character

~ The 'stache Stash ~

While the godlike being known as Void was generally a benevolent entity, due to... a certain unmentionable heinous act committed by the evil doctor, Watts was definitely not on Void's list of people who deserved good things.

One day, due to an incident involving some magic from a being similar to himself, Void found himself stuck with a most glorious mustache which would not disappear for one week (of mortal-realm time). Void frowned as he looked at his face in a mirror. He could appear in whatever form he chose, and normally he liked to appear clean-shaven when in human form, but this was a rather magnificent 'stache. Certainly of a higher caliber than Watts' mustache, or even Port's!

So, of course, Void decided that the best way to enjoy his new semi-permanent facial hair would be to go torment Watts with it.

When Void appeared before Watts in the evil fortress, sporting the most glorious mustache the evil doctor had ever seen, the godlike being expected the doctor to whine or rant or perhaps even cry. He did  _not_  expect Watts to be so utterly dazzled by it that the man promptly declared it the "Godstache" and began building a shrine in its honor.

~oOo~


End file.
